It's no doubt that dealing with divorce is hard for everyone involved. Belinda Palacios of Cal Farley's Boys Ranch shares information on getting through the transition.
Divorce is hard for kids of all ages. It's one of most significant and disruptive experiences a child will have regardless of how amicable. Regardless of marital status, parents still need to emphasize they're a family.
- Put child(ren) in the middle
- Make them the messenger
- Make them your therapist
- Bad mouth other parent in front of child(ren)
- Give kids the 3rd degree after seeing the other parent
Understand that kids need both parents in their life. Be cooperative regarding visitation, notifying of school and extracurricular activities unless other parent becomes an unsafe place for the kids to go-- if this happens take necessary precautions. Parents need to be on the same page when it comes to discipline. One parent cannot be the "cool" parent.
- Support each other with consequences for bad behavior
- Have same rules in both households
- If kids have long term or significant issues with the divorce, seek counseling.
If divorce is pending, talk to the kids about it and let them know what to expect. Sit down with spouse and device a co-parenting plan.
If divorce is done, it's not too late to repair mistakes and begin process. Make amends and work together to raise health and happy kids.